Super Bowl halftime shows have traditionally been studies in mediocrity. Washed up musicians, poor choreography, and lame effects, all packed together into a remarkably unentertaining fifteen minutes of entertainment. It's like a car crash you can't turn away from, only someone paid millions of dollars to make it happen.
This year, we were blessed with the presence of the Black Eyed Peas, a group that has managed to go from a pretty well-respected '90s hip hop group to one of the biggest jokes in music over the course of their thirteen year career. They're an unholy mess of generic hooks, autotuned vocals, and soulless performances that has sold upwards of 27 million albums in the last ten years.
It was a safe choice for the NFL, one that surprised absolutely no one when it was announced, yet their appearance did mark one important halftime show milestone: it was the first time since 2004 that someone with breasts performed on the main stage.
It's remarkable how sterile the NFL has managed to make the Super Bowl halftime show over the last decade.
In the wake of the “wardrobe malfunction” that exposed a minute fraction of the female body to the world in 2004, rocking American values to their very core in the process, headliners were limited to washed up male musicians with a low probability of getting naked in the course of their show. The biggest performance venue in the history of mankind was reduced to a vessel for aging rock stars looking to reclaim their old glories.
So when the Black Eyed Peas took the stage on Sunday, lowered from the rafters clad in some kind of futuristic space outfits, they were downright edgy.
There was a woman singing, they played songs written in the 21st century, there were people in spandex covered in neon lights—it was like someone had transported the Super Bowl forty years into the future, a refreshing change from the stale shows of the past.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not defending the Black Eyed Peas. Far from it. I just believe that the Super Bowl halftime show should be a snapshot of music from the time, not a sexless attempt to appease conservative Americans with stars from their childhood.
The halftime shows we remember are ones that showcased popular acts of the time: New Kids on the Block in 1991, Michael Jackson in 1993, N*Sync in 2001, and yes, Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake in 2004. As terrible as New Kids on the Block were, their performance is infinitely more memorable than anything some classic rock band can pull off thirty years past their prime.
Even though the Black Eyed Peas are staggeringly terrible musicians who continue to destroy the face of pop music with reckless abandon, I'm glad they were picked in place of another throwaway act.
Twenty years from now, I'll still remember the neon dancers, the terrible high school talent show choreography, and the fact that will.i.am's monotone chanting in “I Gotta Feeling” was somehow autotuned, because that all sadly reflects the state of pop music today. And I'd still take that any day over listening to Roger Daltrey try to sing again.
- 2/8/11
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